In Good Times and In Bad
by toria55
Summary: After the The Telling. How Jack reacts to what happened
1. Default Chapter

Title: In Good Times and In Bad  
  
Author: toria55  
  
Rating: PG for now  
  
Spoilers: Just my version of Jack and Irina working together. This takes place following the end of The Telling, but before we find out that Sydney was missing for two years.  
  
Disclaimer: Alias and all it's characters are owned by JJ Abrams and ABC. This story is not intended to infringe on the copyrights of the original creators. It is written for entertainment purposes only and is not intended for profit in anyway.  
  
My Beta: I want to give a very special thank you to Ukskyblue. Thank you for volunteering to do the beta. I really enjoy our PM's. Your input in this story was invaluable to me.  
  
Chapter 1  
  
Part 1  
  
After Sydney Bristow knew for sure that Irina Derevko and Arvin Sloane had both successfully avoided capture, Agent Michael Vaughn drove her to Cedars- Sinai Medical Center so that she could check on the physical condition of her father.  
  
When they arrived at the hospital Sydney meet with Dr. Ronald Coeyman. The doctor informed her that they were running a series of blood tests, to determine what was in the IV that Sloane was injecting him with. Based on the preliminary results, it appears that he was being injected with nothing more than a mild sedative. If the remaining tests come back negative, the effect of the sedative should work it's way out of his system in the next 48 hours.  
  
After meeting with Dr. Coeyman, Sydney headed to her father's room. Agent Vaughn chose to wait for her in the visitors lounge. When Sydney entered her father's room Nurse Margie Manser was just finishing taking his blood pressure. Margie informed Sydney that her father's pressure was a little low, but that was expected, considering the sedation that he had been subjected to.  
  
The conversation in the room caused Jack to stir and open his eyes.  
  
"Hi, Dad," Sydney said softly. "How are feeling?"  
  
Ignoring her concern, Jack asked, "Did you get Sloane and Derveko?"  
  
"No, Dad, we didn't," she informed him.  
  
"Did you see Il Dire?" he asked, as he started to sit up.  
  
"Dad, relax, I'll tell you everything in the morning," she said as she laid her hand on his chest to keep him immobile.  
  
Jack laid back and closed his eyes. He immediately fell back to sleep.  
  
Margie Manser was not an employee of Cedars-Sinai Hospital. Her actual employer was the CIA. Although she did not know who Jack or Sydney Bristow was, she knew that an important assignment had taken place that evening.  
  
Seeing the weariness that was starting to affect Sydney, Margie suggested that Sydney go home. "Your father will probably be asleep for the rest of the night. He probably won't even remember that you were here. Why don't you go home and get some rest yourself?"  
  
"Alright," Sydney answered. Before she left, she instructed the nurse, "If he wakes up, tell him that I was here and that I'll be back first thing in the morning?"  
  
"Of course I will," she promised.  
  
"Thank you," Sydney said. She then squeezed her father's hand and kissing him on the cheek she said, "Good-night Dad. I'll see you tomorrow."  
  
tbc 


	2. Chapter 1 Part 2

Chapter 1  
  
Part 2  
  
It was 5 o'clock in the morning when Jack woke to the voice of someone calling his name. When he found the energy to open his eyes, he was greeted with the sight of Director Kendall and Dr. Barnett standing in his room. They were looking extremely distraught. He knew immediately that there would be only one reason for these two people to be visiting him. He sat up quickly and asked, "What is it? Where's Sydney?"  
  
"Jack," Kendall started slowly, "there was a fire at her house. Her roommate, Francine Calfo is missing. Will Tippin was found unconscious in the bathroom. He had been stabbed."  
  
Kendall was finding it hard to continue. He turned to Dr. Barnett for support. She nodded at him that he was doing fine and he should continue.  
  
"There was a body found in Sydney's bedroom. It was burned, beyond recognition. Michael Vaughn confirmed that the jewelry on the body was Sydney's."  
  
Jack's jaw muscles flinched. At first, he said nothing. He just stared at Kendall. He was trying to figure out if he was really awake, or if he was dreaming. When he saw the first ray of the day's sun starting to break through his window, he knew that he was not dreaming.  
  
When he was able to speak, he simply asked, "Where is she?"  
  
Kendall realized that he had been holding his breath. He inhaled and told Jack, "The body is at the CIA morgue. They're running DNA tests for a positive confirmation."  
  
"Do you know who's responsible?" Jack inquired.  
  
"No, not yet, but we have every available agent working on it." Kendall assured him.  
  
Jack pulled his hand away, as Dr. Barnett tried to touch him, "Jack, I know that right now..."  
  
"Don't," he said, before she had a chance to say anything more.  
  
Not ready to give up so easily, Dr. Barnett continued, "Jack, you need to..."  
  
"I need you to leave," he said without any signs of emotion.  
  
Hearing the detachment in his voice, Dr. Barnett knew that there was no way to offer comfort. "Alright, but here's my private number. Call me anytime, day or night," she told him as she laid the paper on his bedside table.  
  
"Kendall," Jack called out, as the two started to leave his room.  
  
"Yes?" he answered.  
  
"I'll be in at about one, for my debrief on Sloane," he told him.  
  
"Jack, you don't have to."  
  
Ignoring Kendall's concern, Jack continued, "When I get there, I want to see all the reports that you have."  
  
Knowing that there was no point in arguing with him, Kendall told him, "Alright, Jack. You'll have what I have."  
  
Jack then looked away and pushed the button for the nurse. While he waited for the nurse to answer his page, he rubbed the bridge of his nose, trying to relieve the pressure that was building inside his head.  
  
TBC 


	3. Chapter 1 Part 3

Chapter 3  
  
Part 3  
  
Cassie Gardner, a young nurse answered Jack's page. She entered his room and asked, "Yes sir, what is it?'  
  
"I want this out," he said, referring to the IV that was in his arm.  
  
Trying to follow the rules, the young nurse informed him, "I'm sorry sir, but I can't do that without a doctor's order. Your doctor should be here in about an hour or so. He...."  
  
"Fine," Jack said, as he started to remove the apparatus himself.  
  
"You can't do that!" Cassie said, as she rushed towards him.  
  
She froze mid step as Jack ordered her, "Don't...take another step."  
  
"But sir...,"  
  
Cassie was relieved to see Nurse Manser entering the room. "Cassie, you can go. I'll take care of this," Margie told her.  
  
As Cassie left the room Margie placed an envelope on the bedside table. "I'll do that for you, Mr. Bristow. The last thing you need is a complication," she said, as she removed the needle from his arm.  
  
"Where are my clothes?" he asked her, as she was removing the IV.  
  
"They're under the bed. I'll get them for you."  
  
When she was done removing the IV, Margie reached under the bed and pulled out a plastic bag that contained the now dirty clothes he came in with.  
  
"Thank you," he said.  
  
Margie knew he wasn't just thanking her just for taking out the IV, but he was also thanking her for not giving him unwanted advise that he had no intention of heeding.  
  
Jack stood up to remove his hospital gown. If Margie had not been there to catch him, he would have fallen. "Let me help you," she said as she assisted him to a chair.  
  
"Why aren't you trying to stop me?" he asked her.  
  
As she helped him put his shirt on, she told him, "I've been doing this job a long time, Mr. Bristow. I know men like you can't be stopped. I find that it's better to help you do what you need to do, rather than offer you advice on why you shouldn't do it."  
  
After helping him with his shirt, she handed him his pants. While he was buckling them, she asked him, "You don't remember that she was here, do you?"  
  
His look of surprise, confirmed for Margie that Jack had no memory of the last minutes he spent with his daughter.  
  
As she helped him put on his socks, she told him, "You talked to her a bit. You asked her if anyone had been caught. She told that they had gotten away. Then you fell asleep."  
  
While helping him put on his shoes, she told him, "She wanted me to give you a message when you woke up."  
  
Margie had always prided herself on being emotionally detached from her patients, but there was something heartbreaking about this situation. Her voice began to crack as she told him, "She wanted me to tell you that she'd be here first thing in the morning."  
  
Jack closed his eyes and once again tried to rub out the pressure that was building inside his head.  
  
As he was putting on his shoes, she told him, "Mr. Bristow, before she left, she kissed you and said, 'Good-night Dad, I'll see you tomorrow'."  
  
"Call me Jack," he told her.  
  
"Good luck, Jack," she said, as she handed him the envelope that she had placed on the bedside table. Having anticipated that her patient would be leaving, Margie had retrieved his personal effects.  
  
TBC 


	4. Chapter 2

Chapter 2  
  
Jack caught a cab in front of the hospital and had it take him to the CIA garage, where he had left his car. He then headed for Sydney's house.  
  
Once there, he found that the street had been blocked off by security. He double parked his car and walked the last block to his daughter's house. As he started to move under the yellow police tape, he was stopped by an LA police officer. "Sorry, sir. You'll have to step back," the officer told him.  
  
Jack didn't want any trouble; he just wanted to get to the house. He informed the officer that the house belonged to his daughter. He also told him that he had thirty seconds to call someone and get clearance for him to pass.  
  
The officer didn't need the thirty seconds. He had already been alerted that Jack was expected. He stepped aside and allowed him to cross under the tape. The officer then radioed his Chief and told him that Jack was on his way.  
  
Jack surveyed the damage as he walked toward the house. There was barely a shell of the structure standing. The closer he got to the house, the stronger the pressure grew inside his head. He entered the house and proceeded directly to Sydney's room. The pressure in his head increased as he took in the sight of the white tape that marked the spot where a body had once laid.  
  
Jack was trying to comprehend the destruction that he was seeing, when he was startled by Marcus Dixon, who had walked up to him and offered his condolences.  
  
Jack responded to Dixon's condolences by asking him, "What do you know about what happened here?"  
  
Dixon recalled the trauma of having lost his wife. He remembered his need to know everything that was available. Out of respect for Jack's professionalism, Dixon told him what he knew. "It appears that the fire was probably ignited by acetonitrile. It was set so that the burn was contained primarily in this room. It did its damage before anyone on the outside even noticed the flames."  
  
While Dixon was talking, Jack headed out of the house to look around. Although it may have appeared that Jack was not listening to what he was saying, Dixon knew that he was. He followed Jack outside and continued with the rundown of what he knew, "Tippin was found in the bathtub. He was stabbed in the gut and has a choke line around his neck. We suspect that whoever started the fire, that they didn't know he was in the house or they didn't care that he was here."  
  
Jack turned to Dixon with a look of confusion, "Are you telling me that whoever stabbed Tippin, isn't the same person who started this fire?"  
  
"Yes. We think it was two different assailants." Dixon wondered how much shocking news Jack was going to be able to handle. He took a deep breath and told him, "Jack, all signs are pointing in the direction that Francine Calfo, is the second double, from Dr. Markovic's Project Helix."  
  
"Francie? What proof do you have?" Jack inquired.  
  
Dixon gave Jack a synopsis of the evidence that they had. He told him, "We found a prescription bottle of Provacillium in the bathroom. We don't know where Francie is, and the police said that Will kept mumbling something that sounded like, 'it's not Francie.'"  
  
The only piece of good news he had to offer was that they found the knife that was used to stab Tippin and there were fingerprints all over it.  
  
Jack walked back in the house and once again surveyed Sydney's room. He told Dixon, "I want a preliminary report from all the investigators on my desk before the end of the day."  
  
"Alright." Dixon replied.  
  
"Where's Vaughn?" Jack inquired.  
  
"They took Sydney's body...."  
  
Jack's look stopped Dixon in mid sentence. He informed him, "We don't know that it's her."  
  
"You're right," Dixon answered, apologetically. He then corrected himself and told Jack, "They took the body to the CIA morgue. Vaughn went with it. They took Tippin to Cedars-Sinai."  
  
Just before leaving his daughters house, Jack noticed what was left of Sydney's jewelry box. He opened it and rummaged through it until he found what he was wanted. He placed the silver earrings in his pocket and left the house.  
  
Jack returned to his car. Before turning on the engine, he closed his eyes and again tried to rub out the pressure that was building in his head. He quickly opened his eyes as he found that closing them only produced images of flames and the sound of someone screaming.  
  
tbc 


	5. Chapter 3

Chapter 3  
  
After leaving Sydney's house, Jack returned to Cedars-Sinai Medical Center. When he arrived, he found that Will was out of surgery. Will was now occupying the room that Jack had vacated earlier in the day.  
  
When Jack entered Will's room, he was both surprised and pleased to see that Margie Manser was taking care of him.  
  
"Don't you ever go home?" he asked her.  
  
She turned around and was startled by how pale Jack looked. "My relief nurse will be here soon," she told him.  
  
Will lay motionless on the bed. He was connected to multiple tubes and machines. Jack slowly walked over to him. He laid his hand on Will's and whispered, "I'm going to find out who did this to you, Will. I promise."  
  
Jack turned to Margie and asked what Will's chances for survival were?  
  
"He's got more than a 30% chance." She then told, "His family is expected in this afternoon. Do you know them?"  
  
"No, I've never met them. Will was..., is... a friend of my daughter. He just got caught up in something he had no control over."  
  
He then asked, "Has there been a cover worked out for what happened to him?"  
  
"Yes. His family is going to be told that he was investigating an oil scam that ended up having international repercussions."  
  
Jack thought that lie was as good as any. He felt sympathy for Will's parents as they would be losing their son, whether he survived this attack, or not. Jack had no doubt that the CIA had every intention of placing him into a witness protection program for at least a few years.  
  
"Whom can I speak to about being kept informed of Will's progress?" he asked the nurse.  
  
"We have been ordered to give Mr. Kendall daily progress reports. I suspect you can get what you need from him," she answered.  
  
As Jack turned to leave, he was over come by a wave of dizziness. Once again, Margie was nearby and was able to prevent him from falling. "I assume you haven't eaten anything since you left here, have you? Come with me," she said, before he had a chance to deny her statement.  
  
"No, I have to go. I have to go to see my..., I have to go to the Op Center," he told her as he struggled to regain his balance.  
  
"Whatever's there, will be there when you get there," she informed him. "Come with me before you end up back here as a patient."  
  
Under Jack's protest, Margie guided him to her supervisor's office. On the way to the office, she grabbed a tray of food off the food cart. She sat Jack down at the desk and ordered him to start eating. "I'll be right back," she said.  
  
When Margie left the room, Jack sat back in his chair and stared at the ceiling. He was too tired to raise his hands and rub out the pressure that was once again invading his head. All he could think of was getting to the Op Center and proving that it is not his daughter, lying on the cold metal table.  
  
"Jack, if you don't eat, you're going to pass out and I know you don't have time for that," Margie said, when she returned to the office. She placed a cup of coffee in front of him and told him, "Here, this coffee is better than that stuff we give to our patients."  
  
"Thank you," he said as he accepted the coffee. After taking a drink he asked her, "Are you on duty 24 hours a day?"  
  
She smiled and told him, "No. I stay longer for special cases. I have level 4 security clearance. I want to be here when Will's parents arrive. I took a nap in the nurse's lounge after you left."  
  
Jack was impressed to hear that Margie had such a high security clearance. He asked her, "How do rate your clearance level?"  
  
"My husband was an agent. That's how I got involved in this," she told him.  
  
"He was..., an agent?"  
  
"Yes. He died almost a year ago. We were stationed in Maryland. My children are both going to college at UCLA. They insisted that I move out here. So here I am in smoggy California."  
  
"I'm sorry, about your husband," he told her. "Did he die in the line of duty?"  
  
"Sort of," she told him. "He worked too hard. He had a heart attack."  
  
"Your children, are they boys or girls?" he asked her.  
  
"One each. They're twins. They're in their third year of college. Jerry is studying medicine and Lisa is into linguistics. She wants to work in international diplomacy. She takes after her father."  
  
"My daughter can speak a dozen languages. She can even do the accents," he told her, proudly.  
  
"Tell me about her, Jack," Margie asked him.  
  
He looked at Margie and with the brims of his eyes turning red, he told her, "We don't know yet that it's her. Whoever is responsible for destroying her house could have kidnapped her and planted a look-a-like body in her room. If Sydney's alive, she'll find a way to get away from them."  
  
"She looked like she was a resourceful young woman," Margie said, trying to offer him comfort.  
  
"She was. I mean she is," he said, confused. He then placed his head in his hands and told her, "Margie, I don't know what I'll do, if it's her."  
  
"I do," she told him, firmly. "You'll find out who was responsible and you'll bring them to justice."  
  
A chill ran through Margie, when Jack sat up and looked at her. He coldly told her, "You're wrong. When I find out who is responsible for this, I will kill them."  
  
Margie didn't doubt for an instant that he meant exactly what he said. She told him, "Either way, you have a reason to go on, don't you? Now eat, because I'm not letting you out of here until you do."  
  
tbc 


	6. Chapter 4

Chapter 4  
  
After Jack finished eating, Margie handed him a mini shaving kit. She told him, "Before you go, why don't you freshen up. You wouldn't want anyone at Headquarters' thinking you're losing control."  
  
Jack reached up and ran his hand across his face. He defiantly needed a shave. He accepted the shaving kit from her.  
  
"Give me your coat and I'll steam out some of those wrinkles for you," she said to him, as she helped him remove his suit coat.  
  
Fifteen minutes later, Jack returned from the men's room, looking just slightly better than he did before shaving and combing his hair.  
  
Margie had steamed out as many wrinkles as she could. She also steamed his tie that she had found stuffed in his pocket.  
  
While putting on his tie, he thanked her again for all that she has done for him.  
  
While he was putting on his coat, Margie reached into the pocket of her smock and told him, "I almost forgot. You left this behind, when you left before." She then handed him the card with Dr. Barnett's phone number on it.  
  
"I don't need that," he told her, making no effort to take the card.  
  
"I wrote my number on it, in case you want to talk again, or if you want an update on Will," she said, trying to bribe him to take the card.  
  
Jack accepted the card hesitantly, as he would not mind being able to find out first hand information on Will's progress. "Thank you. Your husband was a lucky man," he said as he placed the card in his wallet. He then left the hospital and drove to the Op Center.  
  
Once he arrived at the Center, Jack headed straight to the basement where morgue was. When he got off the elevator, he was greeted by a security guard. "She's in room three, sir."  
  
When he arrived at room three, he found two guards on duty in front of the door and a third one inside the room. It was obvious that the CIA was making sure they did not lose track of the body.  
  
After entering the room, Jack's attention was directed to the exam table and the white sheet that was covering a body. Vaughn was sitting next to table with his head down. The doctor was working at his desk.  
  
Jack walked up to the table and drew back the white sheet that covered the blacken form. He held his breath in order to stop from getting sick. He was never able to tolerate the smell of burnt flesh.  
  
Once he over came the nauseous feeling, he examined the charred remains. The length of the body, fingers and hands, all appeared to be the same as Sydney. There was no hair. The body was wearing a blackened ring and a bracelet, that was now encrusted into what was left of the skin. The jewelry did resemble something he had seen Sydney wear.  
  
Dr. Asten walked over to the table, while Jack was examining the body. Jack asked him why he hadn't started doing the autopsy yet.  
  
"We've started the DNA testing, but Director Kendall asked us to wait until you had a chance to see her, before we did any cutting."  
  
Jack was surprised by Kendall's thoughtfulness. He didn't want Jack seeing his daughter, for the last time, with her internal organs sitting in a metal pan and her brain cut open. He was surprisingly grateful for the gesture.  
  
He asked the doctor, "Can you open her jaws?"  
  
"Yes, sir," he said as he used a pair of pliers to spread her mouth open. Jack turned the overhead light so that it was shining into the mouth of the corpse. He looked inside to see if there was a capped molar. He knew that his daughter had only one missing tooth. The one that was extracted on her Taiwan operation.  
  
"Alright," he said, giving the doctor the clearance to let go of the pliers.  
  
"I want a copy of your autopsy the minute it's available," he told the doctor.  
  
"Yes sir."  
  
He then addressed Vaughn for the first time. "Vaughn," he called out.  
  
Vaughn looked up at him. "What a cold bastard," he thought to himself.  
  
Vaughn's disapproving look did not go unnoticed by Jack, but he had no time or desire to offer an explanation for his actions. If he stopped now, he was afraid that he would not be able to continue and he had to continue. For his own sanity, he had to find out what happened.  
  
Once he had Vaughn's attention, he gave him an order. He told him, "I want you to stay here and supervisor. Bring me the report the minute it's available."  
  
Vaughn wanted to reach over the table and strangle Jack. How could he carry on like this was just another dead body? "This is your daughter, for god sake," he thought to himself.  
  
"Did you hear me," Jack repeated, when Vaughn did not reply.  
  
"I heard you. I'll stay with her."  
  
Jack checked his watch. It was 12:30. He had a half an hour to make it to the one o'clock debrief meeting.  
  
On his way up to the 12th floor he stopped in the men's room and proceeded to heave out his stomach contents. After he was done heaving the meal that Margie had forced him to eat, he sat back against the wall of the stall. He wrapped his arms around his bent knees and slowing banged his head against his knees, trying to beat out the pressure that was consuming his head.  
  
After a minute of head banging, he rested his head against his knees and for the first time, he thought about Irina. "I have to contact her. She needs to know. What am I going to tell her?"  
  
He looked at his watch. It was fifteen to one. He got up and washed his face. He'd have to worry about Irina later. For now he had a meeting to attend.  
  
tbc 


	7. Chapter 5 Part 1

Chapter 5  
  
Part 1  
  
After washing his face, Jack looked in the mirror and wondered who the old man was that was staring back at him. "You look like s***," he said to himself. He then straightened out his clothes, the best he could, and headed to his meeting.  
  
Up in the Op Center, they knew he was in the building. They knew he was in the morgue. They knew that he would soon be in the Op Center for his debriefing. They knew he would be on time.  
  
What they didn't know was how to react when he got there. Do they surround him and offer him sympathy? Do they offer to help him investigate, the crime committed against his daughter? Or, do they just ignore him?  
  
When he finally arrived in the office, his body language told them that he did not want to be approached. Everyone, but Marshall Flinkman, ignored him.  
  
Marshall was in his lab with Carrie Bowman. Carrie had been consoling Marshall for the last few hours. Marshall rushed out of his office, when he saw Jack walk by. "Mr. Bristow," he called out.  
  
Jack turned when he heard his name called. Although Marshall usually annoyed the hell out of him, Jack felt sympathy for him as he saw Marshall's red and puffy eyes. "It's ok Marshall. Thank you," he said as he squeezed his shoulder.  
  
"If you need anything, just call me." Marshall told him as reached into his pocket and pulled out a piece of paper. He handed it to Jack and told him, "Here's my cell number, my house number, my office number, Carrie's cell phone, her house number, my private email and the one here at the office."  
  
This small gesture left Jack speechless. "You can call me anytime," Marshall continued. "And I already have pieces of evidence that I'm analyzing. I'll be sure you get a copy of all my reports. And, if you have any questions, well there's my cell phone, my home phone, Carrie's phone...."  
  
"Thank you, Marshall," he said cutting him off. "I know how to get a hold of you," Jack said as he placed the paper in his pocket and headed to his meeting.  
  
It was a minute before one when Jack entered the conference room where the debriefing team was waiting for him. They spent three hours talking to him about what had happened with Sloane.  
  
When they seemed to have exhausted all of their questions, Jack asked them, "Are you done?"  
  
"Yes," they told him.  
  
Once they confirmed that the debrief was over, it was Jack's turn to take over the meeting. He stood up and told them, "Now, I have some expectations for all of you. I expect to be informed of everything you find out regarding the status of my daughter. If that body turns out to be her, then I will be involved in every mission associated with finding out who killed her. If it is not her, then you will provide me with all the resources and manpower that I will need, in order to find her."  
  
He paused to be sure that they understood what he had said. "Is that clear?" he asked.  
  
Kendall answered for the group. He told him, "Jack, you know we will do whatever it takes to find out what happened to Sydney. She was one of the finest...."  
  
Jack cut him off. "As long as we understand each other. I'll be in my office, going over the preliminary reports." He then turned and left the room.  
  
Marcus Dixon was waiting in Jack's office. He provided him with a set of preliminary reports. The reports included a transcript of the 911 tape, a report from the LA Police and Fire Departments and the FBI. Dixon had spent the day gathering all these reports and had not yet had time to write his own. He told Jack that he would go and work on his own report and give it to him as soon as it was available.  
  
While Dixon was talking, Jack had already started looking through the reports.  
  
Before leaving, Dixon told him, "Listen, Jack. I know what you're going though. I know what you did for me when Diane was killed. If..."  
  
Dixon stopped when he saw Jack close his eyes and raised his hand in a gesture that meant he wanted him to stop. "Alright, Jack. I'm here if you need anything."  
  
As Dixon turned to leave the office, he heard a very faint and exhausted, "I know."  
  
tbc 


	8. Chapter 5 Part 2

Chapter 5  
  
Part 2  
  
After Dixon left his office, Jack closed the folder that he was reading. He massaged his temples. The pressure in his head had returned. "Focus," he told himself. "If she's still alive then time is being wasted. There's something in one of these reports that I'm missing."  
  
After resting his eyes for a few minutes, Jack switched on his computer and started putting the message out to all his government contacts that he needed their help and he was calling in favors. He would make contact with his black op contacts once he got home.  
  
Although he hoped that somehow Irina would get word about what was happening and contact him, he wasn't sure if he wanted her involvement in any of this. He also didn't know if he could properly explain what had happened to their child.  
  
"I can't think about her right now," he told himself. He looked at his watch. It was after five o'clock. Forensic should have had something ready by this time. He picked up the phone to call them, but put it down when Vaughn entered his office.  
  
When he handed Jack a folder, Vaughn took a seat across from him. His sullen appearance mirrored Jack's.  
  
Once he was seated, he told Jack, "They think she was unconscious before the fire. Her skull was cracked. They have a tentative ID with dental records."  
  
While reading the report, Jack asked, "When will the DNA results be available?"  
  
"They're rushing it through. It should be available sometime tomorrow afternoon. The NSC said that they'd authorize the release of the body once the DNA is confirmed."  
  
"The NSC? What do they have to do with this?" Jack asked.  
  
"They've taken charge of the investigation." Vaughn informed him.  
  
"The hell they have. I'll take care of that later," Jack thought to himself.  
  
Vaughn waited for Jack to say something more, but all he did was continue to read the paperwork in front of him. "Jack, what arrangements are you going to make? I'd like to help."  
  
Jack looked up from the report he was reading and told Vaughn, "I'm not making any 'arrangements' until we get definite confirmation."  
  
"Jack, the dental records are a match, the jewelry was hers, it was her house," Vaughn said, as he realized Jack was holding out false hope that the body in the morgue was not Sydney.  
  
Vaughn was right. Jack was not ready to concede that the body belonged to his daughter. He was annoyed that Vaughn was so eager to bury her. "Tell me something Mr. Vaughn. You've been spending a lot time with my daughter. Spending nights at her house. Sleeping in her bed..."  
  
"What are you getting at?" Vaughn asked suspiciously.  
  
"Why not yesterday? What was so important that you decided to drop her off at the curb, instead of sleeping with her?"  
  
Even though Vaughn had been asking himself that very same question, he became defensive when he heard Jack asking it. "I don't think I like what you're implying. Don't try and put the blame for this on me. If you would have kept her out of SD-6 none of this ever would have happened."  
  
Jack gave him one of his infamous ice stares. Vaughn saw the hurt in Jack's eyes. He did not want to make this a blame game. He knew that Sydney would not appreciate him verbally abusing her father.  
  
"Jack, I'm sorry. That was uncalled for. I didn't stay because Sydney was tired. She just wanted to go home and get some rest. Plus, she planned on getting up early so that she could get to the hospital to see you."  
  
Jack too regretted his comment, but he had no intentions of apologizing to Vaughn, for anything. Instead he changed the subject. "Here," he said as he handed Vaughn a copy of a police report. "These people are the ones who called in the fire. This report tells me nothing. I want you to run a complete background on those people. Then I want you to bring them in for more questioning."  
  
"Jack, they were teenagers, on their way home from a party."  
  
"Are you going to do this, or should I find someone else to do it?" Jack asked him, impatiently.  
  
Jack's lack of emotion finally got to Vaughn. He couldn't believe that he could be sitting at his desk, investigating a case, instead of mourning his daughter. "You, cold son of a bitch. Your daughter is dead. Can't you take a day out to mourn her?"  
  
Jack had no intentions of sharing his feelings with Michael Vaughn. He told him, "Vaughn, if I can't have your full cooperation then you're useless to me. Get out of my office. I'll send someone else to talk to them."  
  
Jack saw that Eric Weiss had been hovering close to his office. He was sure that he was there to support his friend. He called him into the office.  
  
"Yes?" Weiss said as when he entered the office.  
  
"This statement was taken by a traffic cop." Jack told him as he handed him the police report. "I want you to go back and re-interview these boys. I want you to draw out more of what they saw. If necessary make arrangements to have them hypnotized. They must have seen more than they realize. You know the routine."  
  
Before Weiss had a chance to accept the assignment, Vaughn stood up and pounded his fist on Jack's desk. He yelled at him, "Is this all you ever think about, Jack? Work? Revenge? You're daughter is dead. Take a f****** day off to give her a proper burial. That's the least you can do for her."  
  
Jack was not in the mood to listen to a lecture from Michael Vaughn. He stood up and pointing at the doorway he told him, "You're useless to me. I told you to get out."  
  
Vaughn wasn't done telling Jack what he thought of him. He ignored his instructions to leave his office and told him, "You were never there for anything in her life. At least be there for her funeral."  
  
"Get out." Jack repeated, loudly.  
  
"Come on Vaughn, let's go." Weiss said as he tried to pull Vaughn away, while he was still yelling at Jack about his incompetence as a father.  
  
As he pulled Vaughn out the office, Weiss told Jack that he would follow up on the police report.  
  
Jack slammed his door shut when they left the office. He sat back at his desk and gripped the edge of it as he tried to get his breathing under control. He knew his short comings as a father. He didn't need Michael Vaughn to point them out to him.  
  
Once he was able to calm down, Jack decided that he had to go home. He could no longer concentrate in his office. On his way out, he stopped at the morgue.  
  
tbc 


	9. Chapter 5 Part 3

Chapter 5  
  
Part 3  
  
When Jack arrived at the morgue he found a new set of guards on duty. Dr. Hei was now in charge. Jack told him that he wanted to see the body.  
  
The doctor looked at Jack and knew that he was on the verge of collapsing. Viewing his daughter's remains was not a healthy thing to be doing. "Are sure you want to do this?" he asked.  
  
Jack's silent reply was his answer. The doctor reluctantly pulled the body out from it's refrigerated crypt. Jack again pulled back the sheet.  
  
"Jack, don't do this to yourself," a voice said from behind him.  
  
Jack turned and saw Dr. Barnett entering the room.  
  
"Please Jack, let me help you," she pleaded with him.  
  
"I don't need your help," he told her as he turned back to the body.  
  
"Jack, if you don't let someone help, then I will see to it that you are placed on a medical leave," she informed him.  
  
Dr. Barnett was now standing in front of Jack, on the other side of the table. He looked up at her and venomously said to her, "If you do anything to keep me out of this investigation, you will regret it."  
  
"Are you threatening me?" she asked, trying to hide the fear that ran through her blood.  
  
Jack realized that Dr. Barnett did in fact have the power to prevent him from being a part of this investigation. He could not afford the time it would take to fight to get his job back. He contritely told her, "Dr. Barnett, if you really care about my mental health, then you know that I have to be involved in finding out what happened to her."  
  
Dr. Barnett agreed to a compromise. "Jack, I won't put up any roadblocks, but you have to take care of yourself. You need to go home and get some rest."  
  
He glanced at the body lying in front of him. He swallowed to suppress the emotions that wanted to overpower him. He bent down and placed a kiss on the forehead of the remains. He whispered into her ear, "Forgive me." He then left the morgue without saying another word to either doctor.  
  
tbc 


	10. Chapter 6 Part 1

Chapter 6  
  
Part 1  
  
Jack arrived home and realized that he hadn't eaten anything since the lunch he threw up hours ago. He went to his kitchen and found a can of tuna fish. He opened the can and emptied it into a bowl. He grabbed a fork and head to his office, where he made phone calls to his black op contacts until he finally fell asleep with his head resting on his desk.  
  
He was brought out his slumber by the sound of his private phone ringing. "Sydney?" he asked excitedly, as he answered the phone.  
  
"Hello, Jack."  
  
"Irnia?" he said, disheartened, as reality sunk in.  
  
Irina had heard rumors that something terrible had happened to their daughter. She didn't believe it. She had just seen her. She was healthy, strong and alert. Sydney had been well trained. She was not the type of person to die in a careless house fire. Now, her husband was answering his private phone as though he was expecting their daughter to be calling him.  
  
She angrily demanded to know. "Is this a trick? Are you trying to trick me into resurfacing?" When he didn't answer, she demanded to know, "Where's Sydney?"  
  
Once again he answered with silence.  
  
"This is a cruel trick, Jack. Using your own daughter as bait. How could even you be that odious?" she screamed at him.  
  
Irina's accusations left Jack speechless. As he heard her raves, he thought to himself, "How could I be that odious? How could you think I would use my own daughter's death as bait to lure you out of hiding?"  
  
"Jack," she yelled into the receiver. "Jack, what are doing? Are you having this call traced? Jack, answer me." It was clear that she was getting desperate. She wanted him to tell her that it was a trap. A cruel, ingenuous trap, designed to recapture her.  
  
As he heard her yelling and accusing him of using their daughter as bait, he yelled back, "How dare you! How dare you think I would do something so despicable?" Before she had a chance to answer, he slammed the receiver down.  
  
When the phone rang 20 seconds later, he pulled the plug so that he would no longer hear it's ring.  
  
tbc 


	11. Chapter 6 Part 2

Chapter 6  
  
Part 2  
  
After hanging up the phone, Jack slouched back in his chair as the reality of the previous day hit him. Today is the day he will get the DNA report that will confirm the destruction of his daughter or the hope for her future.  
  
It was already 7:30 in the morning. He had to get to the office. From years of abuse, every muscle in his body hurt as he stood up and slowly started to move. Before heading for the shower, he stopped and made a pot of strong coffee.  
  
While showering, he couldn't get Irina's words out of his head. How could she accuse him of using their daughter as bait? Why didn't he just explain to her that she woke him out of a deep sleep? That he had been dreaming about Sydney, when the phone rang.  
  
As he got out of the shower and put on his robe, he was confident that she would call back and then they could talk rationally. As he brought out his razor he laughed at the idea of the two of them having a rational conversation.  
  
"Damn it," he said, as he dropped a fresh razor blade on the floor.  
  
When he bent over to pick up the blade, he punctured his thumb on it. "Damn it," he said again, as he put the tip of thumb in his mouth and then slowly pulled it out.  
  
As he watched the blood slowly trickle out of his thumb Jack sat on the floor of the bathroom, and leaned up against the wall. He picked up the blade that had just punctured his thumb on. He drifted into a mental fog as he laid the blade against his right forearm and lightly ran it vertically up his arm feeling it scratch his skin.  
  
While running the blade against his arm, flashes of his past came to mind. He remembered his wedding day. He remembered the promises they made to love and honor each other in good times and in bad, until they were parted by death.  
  
As he slowly drew the blade down his arm, pressing slightly harder, he remembered the day that they were parted by death. He remembered the look of confusion in his daughter's eyes as he tried to explain to her what death meant. He remembered telling her how someday the three of them would be together in heaven, a conception that he had long ago stopped believing in.  
  
As he pressed the blade lightly into his wrist, and he watched the small droplets of blood roll down his arm, he heard a voice screaming at him. "You were never there for anything in her life. At least be there for her funeral. You were never there for anything in her life. At least be there for her funeral," the voice repeated over and over again until he finally dropped the blade.  
  
"Damn you, Vaughn," he said as he got up and retrieved his first aid kit. He poured surgical glue into the deepest part of his wound and he squeezed the cut together until the glue dried. He then bandaged the damage. He was grateful that his long cuffs would hide the evidence of what he almost did.  
  
After he finished dressing, Jack grabbed a cup of coffee and some toast. He returned to his office and checked for information from his black op contacts. Something was happening, they all told him, but it had been less than twelve hours since he had called them, they didn't have any specifics for him.  
  
Before leaving the house he checked the answering machine that was connected to his private number. There were four calls. The first three calls were hang-ups. The message on the forth call simply said, "Damn you, Jack."  
  
tbc 


	12. Chapter 7 Part 1

Chapter 7  
  
Part 1  
  
It was after ten o'clock when Jack arrived at the Op Center. When he arrived he was approached by Eric Weiss. Weiss supplied him with a report on the follow up investigation that he conducted on the boys who called in the fire.  
  
Weiss' questioning of the boys found that as they turned onto Sydney's street they were passed by a gray BMW. Arrangements were being made to have the boys hypnotized to see if they saw the license plate number.  
  
Before Jack could make the suggestion, Weiss informed him that he had already had all the police records changed so that they boys could never be traced.  
  
Once Jack was satisfied that the safety of the witnesses had been taken care of, he asked Weiss where Vaughn was.  
  
Weiss shook his head and said, "I don't know. I haven't seen him since I left him last night, and he isn't answering my calls."  
  
As Weiss was leaving Jack told him, "Eric, right now, he might tell you that he doesn't need a friend, but he does."  
  
"I'll do what I can," Weiss assured him.  
  
Two hours after his meeting with Weiss, Jack was packing his briefcase when Vaughn stormed into his office. He threw the DNA results on Jack's desk and said, "Here's your final report. It was her. Now what are going to do to honor her memory?"  
  
The headache that had temporarily left him now returned. Jack picked up the report and reviewed it. After he read the confirming information, he looked up at Vaughn and told him, "I already talked to the Chaplain. He'll put the word out that the day after tomorrow there will be a memorial service."  
  
Jack placed the DNA report in his briefcase and started to leave his office.  
  
"Where are you going?" Vaughn demanded to know.  
  
"I'll be back by Thursday night." Jack informed him.  
  
"Jack, you better be here. You hear me? You better be here for her." Vaughn yelled as Jack left his office.  
  
When Jack left, he headed for the airport where he caught a flight to New York. While in New York he met with three operatives. The information they supplied him with seemed promising, but he would soon find out that it was just the first of many dead ends.  
  
tbc 


	13. Chapter 7 Part 2

Chapter 7  
  
Part 2  
  
Just as he promised, Jack returned to Los Angles on Thursday night. He entered his darkened apartment and made a phone call to the CIA Chaplain, Reverend Craft. The Chaplain assured him that everything had been taken care of, just as Jack had instructed.  
  
After the phone call, Jack went to his liquor cabinet and pulled out a bottle of bourbon. He stared at the unopened bottle and then returned it to the cabinet. Even though he had an overpowering desire to get drunk, he knew that he had to be in complete control of all his senses, in order to do what he needed to do.  
  
"Tomorrow," he thought. Tomorrow, after his daughter's memorial service. Maybe then he would allow himself to get so drunk that his mind would go numb. Maybe then he would be able to close his eyes and not see the flames that stole her away from him.  
  
He returned to his couch and started to review the information his New York contacts had given to him. After a few minutes of staring at the intel, he found that he could not concentrate. His mind kept drifting to Irina.  
  
He tried to tell himself that he could find Sydney's killers without her help. He tried to tell himself that he did not need her to tell him everything would be ok. He did not need for her to tell him that all of this was just a bad nightmare for which he would wake up from.  
  
As he sat back and closed his eyes, his private phone rang. He knew who was calling. He answered the phone anyway. "Yes?" he said.  
  
"Don't hang up, please." she pleaded.  
  
"What do you want, Irina?"  
  
She was relieved to hear that she had his attention for at least a few minutes. "I want you to tell me what happened. Please," she begged him.  
  
"I don't know," he said as leaned forward and massaged his head. "There was fire."  
  
"Oh, god," she gasped.  
  
"Her skull was cracked, she was probably unconscious when the room was set on fire," he told her, trying to easy the trauma.  
  
"You have no idea who did this?" she questioned him.  
  
"Not yet," he told her.  
  
"Arvin? Do you think he did this to pay us back for betraying him?" she asked.  
  
"I haven't eliminated him."  
  
Irina was getting frustrated with Jack. There had to be more. She knew that he was not ready to share with her, but she pleaded with him, "Jack, let me help you. Let me help you find out who did this."  
  
"I'll think about it. How can I get contract you?"  
  
"Run an ad in the Personals, in the London Globe. Have it say, 'Distinguish composure looking for music lover.'  
  
He grunted at her suggestion.  
  
"I just figured no one knew that side of you," she told him.  
  
"Do you ever do that anymore?" she asked, as she reminisced to herself about their time together and how he would write music and dedicated to her.  
  
"Sometimes, it helps me to relax," he told her.  
  
"Maybe someday you can play something for me?"  
  
"Irina, I'm tired. I have to go. I'm burying our daughter tomorrow," he said, changing the subject.  
  
"Jack," she asked casually, "are you having a religious service for her?"  
  
"The CIA Chaplain will be there."  
  
"He's not Orthodox, by any chance, is he?"  
  
"No Irina, he's not Orthodox."  
  
"Well as long as someone is there."  
  
"Irina, don't tell me that you believed that same religious hocus pocus that Laura did?" he said with a sarcastic laugh, recalling their many conversation on the benefits verse the damage that was caused by religious beliefs.  
  
"Jack, don't say things like that, please. My feelings about that were real. I know that my soul is damned, but my baby..., our baby..., her soul..., she had a good soul, Jack." Irina said as she started to cry.  
  
"Yes, she did," he said, trying to comfort her.  
  
Irina dried her tears and asked, "What time will the service start?"  
  
"Why?" he asked suspiciously.  
  
She let out a small laugh and said, "Don't worry, I don't plan on crashing it. I was planning on going to a church and lighting a candle for her. I wanted to do it when your service was taking place."  
  
He shook his head. Irina was always a work-of-contrast to him. Who is this woman who wouldn't hesitate to kill, but finds comfort in the rituals of religion?  
  
He told her that the service was expected to start at ten o'clock.  
  
She thanked him for telling her. "I'll light a candle for you too," she added.  
  
"Don't bother," he said as he hung up the phone.  
  
tbc 


	14. Chapter 8

Chapter 8  
  
Sydney's memorial service was private. Only members of the CIA and the Government were allowed to attend. In order to keep her cover secret, Sydney's friends and neighbors were told that her body was being taken 'out east' for burial.  
  
Francine Calfo's parents were given the same cover story that Will Tippin's parents were given. When asked what happened to their daughter, the FBI told them that they were still investigating her disappearance.  
  
Jack felt that Francine's parents deserved the comfort of being able to bury their daughter. He made arrangements that in about a month, 'Francine's' decomposed body would be found. Her parents would then be able to bury their daughter and move on with their lives, rather then spend years waiting for her to return to them. A return that would never happen.  
  
Sydney's memorial service was held in the reception hall of the CIA headquarters, in Los Angeles. When the guests arrived they were stunned by the beauty of the makeshift chapel. The room was filled with hundreds of white roses. Near the altar was a white pedestal, surround by white rose pedals. On the pedestal was marble box. Inside the box were the cremated remains of Sydney A. Bristow. Lying across the marble box, amid all the white flowers, was a single pink rose.  
  
As the guests arrived they were led to assigned seating areas. Vaughn was seated in the front row. His best friend, Eric Weiss sat to his right. The empty seat to Vaughn's left was reserved for Jack Bristow. To Jack's left sat retired CIA Director, Ben Devlin and his wife, Martha.  
  
Marshall Flinkman and Carrie Bowman sat in the second row along with Marcus Dixon and Director Kendall.  
  
As the ten o'clock hour approached Jack had not been seen. "He better be here," Vaughn kept repeating to Eric, who kept assuring him that Jack would be there.  
  
At ten o'clock sharp Reverend Craft and Jack Bristow entered the hall. Jack shook hands with a few old friends and then took his seat next to Michael Vaughn. Neither man spoke to the other.  
  
As the Chaplain approached the podium he gestured for the musicians to play. The tenor stood and sang, ...Be not afraid, I go before you always, Come follow me, And I will give you rest....  
  
Once the song was completed the Chaplain read from the Gospel of John, "...No greater love has no one than this, than to lay down ones life for his friends..."  
  
Following this theme the Chaplain gave a eulogy that spoke of Sydney bravely and her desire to destroy the evil that she saw.  
  
After he was done speaking of Sydney's virtues, the Chaplain invited the guests to come forward and share their memories of her.  
  
Those who came forward talked about how Sydney always greeted them with a smile. They talked about her compassion and her loyalty. They talked about how obvious it was that she loved Michael Vaughn.  
  
A few speakers, such as Marcus Dixon acknowledged not only her friendship with Michael Vaughn, but her admiration for her father. Jack mentally waived off the gesture. It was obvious that they were just trying to be sympathetic. He seriously doubted that Sydney ever shared her feelings, about him, with any of them.  
  
The last person to come forward to eulogize Sydney was Ben Devlin. "I've heard some wonderful things said about Agent Bristow. All of which I fully agree with. Michael, you knew her for only a short time, but it is obvious that during her last days you were a very important part of her life."  
  
After offering Vaughn his sympathy, Ben looked around the room, to be sure he had everyones attention. He continued, "I'd like to tell you about the last time I spoke to Sydney. It was right here in this room," he said as he gestured to their surroundings.  
  
"It was my retirement dinner, just over a year ago. She took me aside and thanked me for trusting her, when she came to us with a preposterous plan to work as a double agent and bring down SD-6."  
  
Ben then directed his gaze at Jack, "But what she really wanted to do was to thank me for giving her an opportunity to get to know her father. She told me that she grew up wanting him to notice her and because she was given the opportunity to work here, she realized that she always had his attention.  
  
"She told me how in awe she was at what he had accomplished and how she admired and respected the man that he is."  
  
Ben stopped talking to the crowd and directed his attention only to Jack. He told him, "That conversation gave me an opportunity to tell her how much you admired her. I wish you could have seen how that beautiful smile of her's lit up when I told her about the many conversation we had about her.  
  
"I told her that no man loved his child more than you loved her. She kissed me, right here," he said pointing to his left cheek. "She thanked me for confirming what she already knew."  
  
Jack looked down at the ground in front of him. One of the many things he regretted is that he and Sydney never verbally shared their feelings of admiration and love. He always wondered if she knew how he felt about her. Ben would never fully understand what it meant to Jack, to know that Sydney knew how he felt about her.  
  
He was still staring at the ground, thinking about all that they had lost, when he noticed Ben's shoes appear in his eye line. "Jack," Ben said calling for his attention.  
  
Jack looked up at his old friend. Ben was standing in front of him, with a folded American flag. Jack had completely forgotten about the ceremonial presentation of the flag.  
  
When he had Jack's attention Ben held the flag out to him and said, "On behalf of a grateful nation."  
  
Jack's breathing visibly increased. His face lost what was left of its color. The pressure in his head returned as he looked at his friend, standing in front of him with the object that is given to the family of fallen agents.  
  
"I can't," he said, barely audible. If he accepted the flag it meant he was conceding, in front of everyone in the room, that his daughter was truly dead.  
  
Still holding the flag out to him, Ben said, "Yes, you can, Jack."  
  
In order to divert the attention that was focusing on the two men, the Chaplain motioned for the musicians to play.  
  
As they played another song of hope, for the first time since all this happened, Michael Vaughn realized how hard all of this was on Jack. He reached over and placed his hand on Jack's back, for support.  
  
Jack slowly reached up and with unsteady hands, he accepted the flag.  
  
Once Jack accepted the flag Ben gestured for both Jack and Vaughn to get up. He led them the back of the reception hall where a receiving line was started, so that the guests could offer the two men in Sydney's life, their sympathy.  
  
Near the end of the reception Reverend Craft took Vaughn aside and told him that Jack wanted him to have Sydney's ashes, if he wanted them. As Jack had suspected, Vaughn very much wanted them.  
  
He looked around to thank Jack, but he was nowhere to be seen.  
  
Jack had gotten word on a possible lead. He had left the reception without saying good-bye to anyone.  
  
tbc 


	15. Chapter 9 Part 1

Chapter 9  
  
Part 1  
  
Three months into the investigation of Sydney Bristow's death, tempers were running short. People were tired of Jack Bristow yelling at them for not getting information to him fast enough.  
  
Jack was getting more and more frustrated at the interference he was getting from the NSC. He was having daily altercations with their liaison, Robert Lindsey. Not only would he accuse Lindsey of interfering with his investigation, but he also accused him of sabotaging it.  
  
There was more than one occasion when Kendall could tell that Jack was on the verge of physically assaulting Lindsey, and he would step between the two men.  
  
Kendall tried to convince Jack that he needed to be more diplomatic when he was dealing with Lindsey. Jack told him that he didn't have the patience or time to be diplomatic.  
  
When the CIA started to question Jack's multiple overseas flights, Jack made arrangement to pay for his own transportation and expenses as long as he had their backing. Kendall agreed to it as long as Jack was supplying them with information that the CIA could use on other cases.  
  
Even this didn't seem to satisfy Robert Lindsey. Jack was bringing back valuable information, but Lindsey wanted to know who his sources were. Jack refused to give him the information he wanted.  
  
Four months into the investigation of Sydney's death, Jack returned from a two week mission. He gave the CIA and NSC intelligence on the people responsible for the bombing of a pharmaceutical plant in Kenya, but he refused to them where he got the information.  
  
Robert Lindsey approached him while, he was talking to Kendall. Lindsey demand to know how he found out the information. Once again Jack refused to tell him.  
  
"The rumor," Lindsey said, "is that you've been in contact with your ex- wife. If I find out that you're harboring an international terrorist, you will pay the price..."  
  
Jack stood a foot taller than Lindsey and there was no mistaking the fear in Lindsey's eyes when Jack moved within a hair of his face. Towering over him Jack calmly said, "Let me make this perfectly clear to you. I have sacrificed my whole life for this Agency. I gave them my daughter. This Agency owes me. If you do anything to impede my investigation into Sydney's death, then I will kill you."  
  
Jack stepped back and just before walking away, he told Lindsey, "And Mr. Lindsey, every person in this room will confirm for you that when I say 'I will kill you', that it is not just an idle threat. I will kill you."  
  
He then turned and walked away, leaving Robert Lindsay to wipe the sweat off his brow and while doing so he promised himself that if it was the last thing that he ever did, he would bring Jack Bristow to his knees.  
  
tbc 


	16. Chapter 9 Part 2

Chaper 9  
  
Part 2  
  
Jack had made the decision to contact Irina a month after Sydney died. That was when Robert Lindsey showed up in Op Center and informed the CIA that his office was taking over the investigation of her death. From the first time that Jack meet him, he did not trust Lindsey or anyone that worked with him.  
  
Jack was getting nervous. He was concerned that Lindsey suspected he had been in contact with Irina. Although she wasn't the source of all his information, she was supplying him with good deal of what he was passing on to the CIA.  
  
Five weeks after Sydney's death, Jack met with Irina for the first time. These days, everything he did was measured on a calendar that started on the day of her death.  
  
They meet for the first time in a musty smelling hotel room in Venice. Irina had been waiting two days for him to arrive. He gave no explanation of what delayed him.  
  
When he walked into the room Irina rushed to him and threw her arms around his neck. It didn't take long for her to realize that Jack was not returning the embrace.  
  
She stepped back and said to him, "Ok, Jack. If that's how you want it."  
  
"What do you have for me?" he replied, coldly.  
  
She motioned for him to take a seat at the table. She shared with him the information that she has acquired. She watched him as he reviewed her intel. It had only been a few months since she saw him last, in Panama, but she was shocked at how gray he had become in those few months.  
  
He refused her offer of anything to eat or drink.  
  
He passed onto her the intel that he had acquired. They made arrangements to meet again in the three weeks.  
  
After packing his briefcase, Jack turned to Irina as though he wanted to say something to her.  
  
"Is something wrong?" she asked.  
  
He reached into his pocket and handed her a small box. She opened the box and saw that it contained the earrings she had given to Sydney. "Thank you," she said as she struggled to hold back her tears.  
  
"I took them from her house. I cleaned them the best I could," he informed her as he turned and left the room.  
  
"They look as good as new," she said to the closed door.  
  
tbc 


	17. Chapter 9 Part 3

Chapter 9  
  
Part 3  
  
By their third meeting, things were not going well. He argued with her from the minute he entered the room.  
  
She accepted his behavior because it was obvious that he was still plagued by the guilt of their daughter's death. Each time she saw him, he looked worse than the time before. His eyes were puffy and red, he was losing weight and he needed a haircut.  
  
As he sat down and scanned the photos and documents that Irina had provided, he inquired about what information she had found on Amerigo Biagino.  
  
"I don't have anything on him yet, I told you that already," she said, losing her patience.  
  
"What the f*** have you been doing?" he yelled at her.  
  
'That's it," she thought to herself. If he wanted to yell at her about petty things she would allow him that. But, she was not going to allow him to accuse her of not working just as hard as he was to find their daughter's killers.  
  
"I've had about all I can take from you today, Jack. What is bothering you?" she demanded to know.  
  
"We've been doing this for five months and we're no closer to finding out what happened to her then we were on the day she died," he said, as he threw the pen he was holding.  
  
Irina shook her head, she knew him better than that. Something was happening and he was hiding it from her. "Listen to me, Jack. If we aren't completely honest with each other, then we are not going to succeed in finding out who killed her. I know something is wrong and you better tell me what it is."  
  
"Or what? Are you going to run out on me again? Leave her fate for to me to deal with? Just like you did before?" he screamed at her.  
  
Irina stared at him. Her anger was evident in her eyes.  
  
Jack put his elbows up on the table and massaged his temples. He was getting tired of arguing with people. He knew she was working just as hard as he was. "The NCS is watching me," he told her. "They suspect that I've been in contact with you."  
  
She knew it had to be something like that. This was one more pressure that neither of them needed. She watched him massaging his temples. "You have a tension headache, don't you?" she asked.  
  
"No," he lied.  
  
When they were married, he always got tension headaches, when things at work were not going well. There was no mistaking the symptoms. The headaches always made him irritable and tried. She walked over and stood behind him. She placed her fingers on his clavicles and her thumbs at the base of his neck. She slowly started to massage his muscles.  
  
He tried to pull away, but her strength held him back. As he felt her rubbing the pressure out, he sat back and tried to relax. He remembered how good it always felt when she eased his headache with her massage. The feel of her strong hands massaging his neck and shoulders always felt so good.  
  
As she rubbed deep into his muscles she smiled when she felt him relax. Once she realized he had stop resisting her, she slid her hand into the opening of his neckline. "I miss you, Jack," she said, softly into his ear as her hand caressed his chest.  
  
He closed his eyes as she planted wet kisses on the back of his neck. He liked the feel of her mouth against his skin. She wrapped both arms around his neck and captured the tip of his ear between her lips.  
  
As she gently sucked on his ear, he reached up and pulled her arms tighter around him. She felt so good.  
  
Then, as quickly as he reached for her, he pushed her away. "I have to go," he said as he stood up briskly.  
  
She moved toward him.  
  
"Don't.... touch me," he said, as he brushed her hand away.  
  
"Please don't go," she pleaded, as she kept her distance.  
  
"I'll contact you in a week," he said, as he packed his files and prepared to leave.  
  
"Jack, please. We have more work to do," she told him.  
  
The truth was that she needed him to stay. She felt the same guilt over their daughter's death that he did. Just once she wanted him tell him that everything would be all right.  
  
Jack ignored her plea and continued to pack. As he headed for the door, she grabbed his arm and cried, "Jack, please. I need you. Please don't leave me."  
  
He yanked his arm out of her grasp. "I needed you once, too," he said, as he left the room.  
  
Irina opened the door to the hallway. "I don't need you either, Bristow," she yelled to him as he entered the elevator. "I can have any man I want."  
  
"I'm sure a whore like you can," he said, as the doors to the elevator closed.  
  
tbc 


End file.
